The Pieces. 

I found the mid-piece today. As I picked it from the trash piled up from the drawer, it hits me that how curious I was once to fix all these pieces together whenever I got a new puzzle. I would wait for hours to frame the big picture these little bits held. 

My mind felt at ease and I would wait for another batch to be framed. My curiousity lead me to a few encounters where I didn’t want to put things at their destined places, I wanted to fetch new places and order. That’s when I learnt that all the trials were in vain because it was meant to pull out one outcome. 

Now when I go through those left over bits I realise that back then I had a choice to fit things as and when I wanted. But I can’t even figure out the pieces anymore. I don’t know if they’d fit the desired place or they would just sit at the edge. The cuts and shapes have now clouded my skills. I always thought, if the outer pieces are sidelined, it forms a new image, it gives a new angle. But what if I lost this mid piece? 

My puzzle would never be complete! 

But holding this piece today, I feel it’s of no worth anymore. 

Each piece values more than the first one because that’s what enhances the picture. That’s how the story is built. 

Each piece holds a different theory, intact in those outlines it shares. You just don’t know which one falls out first. 

But even today, my curiousity hasn’t faded. I would still come up with new fixtures that serve their purpose and soothe my mind until it begins to shed like a rose which never looses it’s identity, till the last petal falls. 

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Bliss that passed with time

I remember those days 

When I was far away from responsibilities. 

I could cry, laugh or sleep endlessly 

And yet I’d be the beloved one. 
When toys were fortune to me 

And collecting them was a hobby 

That was the happiness of recieving new things

Where sharing them was not my forte 
I was like a free bird 

Creating troubles everywhere 

And yet everyone happily entertained me 

More than the needy one 
It was that time 

When girls and boys weren’t judged on playing together 

When friendships were initiated 

When one was far from worries 
It was how open minded the society was 

When the girl playing out till dark wasn’t worth the worry 

When she was treated equivalent to boys 

When her skirts didn’t offend the society 
Time flied so fast 

Those were the best days of my life 

But I don’t seem to recollect 

Has the society changed or me? 

Ps. 

I sitback and wonder 

Do those fake smiles in the selfies stand anywhere infront of the teethless smiles that we possessed? 

The rummage 

I wander around where you can’t see 

In search of the soul that builds me 

The one that showers blessings on me 

The one that doesn’t leave, even when my shadow does. 
I bear these engraved scars 

In a hope that they fade away 

Expecting new memories to fill in 

Lighting the fire of life in me. 
Overcoming the fears of tommorow 

I search for my soul in the dark 

Fighting through my way 

So that I can at least be myself today. 

An Empty Envelope

Each day goes by as the present is overshadowed by the memories of the past. The mind had lost all contacts of him yet the heart held on to the mementos.
Life has taken its turn. At last we’ve grown old. All these years have brought us far apart from what we used to be. From the unknown phases of life to the joy of your existence we’ve spent it all together. 

All this time is so hard to forget. 

I want to get over it and yet I can’t. Maybe it’s because there are still pieces of you left with me that remind me of US every second of the day. 

A certain thought bugs me when I think of the thought that we could’ve ended on better terms. It should’ve not been so. If only one of us would’ve swallowed the ego and saved this relationship we might have at least been into talking terms today. 

So close and yet distant throughout. Who could’ve imagined that someday we’d become just a contact in our phone list, one that we never conversate with. No matter how much I crave to hear your voice I won’t call. 

On those certain drunk nights I won’t text you. But I would miss you just as much as I do everyday and never let you know about it because I don’t want to be an obstacle to your today or tommorow. 

And so the letter still sits on the table, empty as no words can describe how it felt when I lost the most important part of my life. 

Nothing can ever explain the sleepless nights, the dilemma that I’ve been through. No part of me can express the strength that I’ve gathered just to tell myself that it is over now. And life has just begun.

A day might come when this empty envelope might find its way to you, but that day I would be completely over you.

And you would no longer be a part of me. 

It goes on.. 

When Failure sets in, 

The power to combat lowers. 

Undermining the faith bestowed. 

Stumbling through the course. 
Conguering the virtue of life. 

Facing the inevitable. 

Ascending from the ashes of thoughts. 

Struggling to find oneself. 
The turn is unexpected. 

And yet the gleam excites. 

Breaking the walls of lies. 

Gaping to the newly acquired wisdom. 
Let the wild overhaul set in. 

While the perception still wanders 

Exploring the uncertainity of self. 

Walking the stretch with hope. 

To the anonymous one out there – I hope it reaches you. 

​Since the day we’ve met, there’s never been a day that the thought of you hasn’t crossed my mind. 

The smile that props up when your name is said. 

That skip of a beat when I hear you. 

That flutter in the eye when I see you. 

The spasm my body goes through when your soft hands brush against me. 

That feeling of being in love is what I cherish because of you. 
You’re that someone who transformed me, brought the best out of me. You made me believe in myself, look at things differently.Your influence makes everything easy for me.Your presence just enlightens my thought process from a negative to a cheerful me. 

Enumerous trails of  elation, the nerves, the butterflies, the anxiety, and the euphoria all come together, somehow I just embrace this strong feeling. 

Each time I’m with you, the time passes in a fast forward motion and I desperately feel the need for a pause button where I could cherish those moments I spend with you at my own pace. Like a frozen percfect moment. 

From the silence to the deep conversations we have, even the stupid chatter for hours could give me a reason to be with you. I just learnt that how even our silence can mean so much to me. I realised what an amazing person you are. You’re that one person with whom I can be at my level of crazy and it would never make a difference.

I don’t know how or when I fell for you but I feel that spark everyday. I know I can tell you my deepest, darkest secret, and  you won’t run away. I feel comfortable enough to be at my most vulnerable state and yet merrily shoutout at the top of my voice. 

You’re the reason why all the other relationships that came before became vague and blurry fixtures of my past. I no longer need to hold onto the disintegrating love from my failed relationships, to the hurt and wounds and resentment. I’ve learnt how to let go, that I hadn’t before. It’s when I realized that  I was holding myself back because the fear of being hurt all over again isn’t fair to someone new. Because you’re not my past. Instead, you could be my future.
There is an unconditional feeling whenever I think about you. All of these things can be signs, but the moment I realized I actually love this person, it hit me like a ton of bricks. It knocked the air out of my lungs. And it’s the best feeling in the world.
Even though you might not feel the same about me, I’m happy to be in this. Because isn’t that the point of love? 
To find a love that never leaves, even when it does. To find a love that was so incredibly powerful, that it remains engrained in your brain. To find a love that was so intoxicatingly magical, that it never leaves my soul.

I’ll always know that at one point I HAD IT ALL! 

To the coming 365 days 

​So in just 10 days 2016 is about to be over . It might have been a great year for some of us and probably not something the rest of us desired for. Well that definitely isn’t controlled by us at all.The only strings one can manage to pull is how the situations affect us.

So to the end of the year how far do you think you’ve grown? Have you managed to step out of the comfort zone yet? Have you planned out your schedule or are you still in the bed scrolling down the post and reading this one?
Does a huge list pop up when you think about all this ? Sure does! 

  • ‌You didn’t give someone the chance to follow up.
  • ‌You’ve been a total jerk.
  • The lazyness has taken all over.
  • ‌You never started the workout you planned .
  • ‌The diet has all remained the same.
  • ‌The learning and exploring has just stopped.
  • ‌Enthusiasm has completely disappeared once and for all.
  • ‌You feel that it all has come to stand still .

Just check for yourself how many of them have you accomplished? Er no it’s been confined to.

No matter what you do, make each day count , do something for yourself think of it as an attribute to self . Let your day and the effort you put in bring out the best in you. Challenge yourself to strive for it. Go further rather than being stuck at one place. 

All the casual things keep happening, they’d still be around the corner each time you look back but what you have in present is a pathway you’ll usher. 
Resolutions each year are pledged to be demolished. For they’re something you’d rather never follow. If you intent to put a step forward and look out for a better version of ‘YOU’, the year will build on its own when your days have been equally constructive . In the end you’ll always achieve what you worked hard for.
Looking onto 2017 there are a bunch of things you’d probably want to alter. It might even take some time so what you just hang yourself in dismal and give up on it? For sure NO. Take your time build it up. There’s no deadline to be perfect there are always infinite odds if you believe in yourself.
Neither a failed today nor a failed tommorow will ever affect the outcome you’ve endeavoured.